A Change of Perspective  ©Connie Sitterly The information contained in these responses should not be considered legal advice. Consult an attorney if you have any legal questions.

Dear Workplace Doctor:

I am so frustrated I'm considering quitting, foregoing retirement benefits.
I can't complete a project because midway a decision is made to start on a different project. I don't see results and I don't feel any sense of closure or completion. I probably spend 25 percent of my time doing the job a second time. Just when I think I've learned a new system, the system changes. It's affecting my relationships at work and at home. How can I cope better?

Bob W.

You're not alone! Changes are frustrating and overwhelming even when we know that continuos change is a given, so let me propose some questions and points to ponder.

Consider these questions:

1. What can you change?
2. What can you control?
3. What are the benefits of changing and the consequences of not changing?
4. What can you not change or control?
5. What is your attitude about the change? Is your resistance or reluctance due more to attitude or ability?  How well we respond to changes is a personal choice, determined by our attitude and our ability. Since we choose our attitude, we can change it.
6. What's the worst thing that can happen?
7. Do you have the skills, knowledge or abilities required to make the change? If not, can they be acquired? Resources and support? Willingness?
8. What are your options if you choose not to change? Will not changing impact your job security, advancement, or value?
9. Can you obtain more information about the changes affecting you? Understanding breeds acceptance. Having more facts won't stop the change, but it can make it more palatable.
10. Who can you openly discuss the with stoat will allow you to express what you really think, feel, fear, want and are willing to do -- and not do?  An objective listener may bring out some benefits or advantages you need to hear. Two people facing the same situation may perceive it differently; one seeing insurmountable obstacles, the other seeing possibilities and opportunities. Consider the possibility that things happen for a reason. Some changes can be blessings even if forced by circumstances. Occasionally some people actually benefit from forced changes, such as prompting a career transition, going back to school, relocating, starting their own business, deciding what they really want to do, before they got sidetracked with job security, kids and a second mortgage years ago.
11. Can you project five or ten years from now? Life is short. Put the changes into perspective. In the scheme of things, how does this change fit?

Can you detach or channel your emotions into the positive energy necessary to form a personal action plan?

If you don't like the way things are going, take control -YOU change something.

If you can't figure out what you want, then determine what you don't want. Life, like work is a journey, a do-it- yourself project, with no guarantee. The good news is that moving through these changes will help you to move to the next phase of your life and career, forcing positive growth and development of your full potential.

We can't always control what happens to us, but we can choose how we respond what we learn from it. Your feelings are normal and natural. Now, respond to the questions- write about it, discuss it, and most importantly do something about it. Take control. Like the Serenity PrayerÖ" Change what you can, accept what you cannot, and have the wisdom to know the difference."

The Workplace Dr. ^TM